What is self-confidence?

What does being self-confident mean to you?

here is a dictionary definition: “a feeling of trust in one’s abilities, qualities, and judgement”

 

Self confidence will a slight different meaning to each individual.

It depends if you are having a good day or not right?

 

Feeling confident has to come from within. I used to think it was about how I looked.

If I was thin enough I would feel self-confident.

 

Hmmmm not so! When I got really lean a while back, sure I felt great but all my ‘old

stuff’ was still there. I still wasn’t happy. I still craved foods and felt guilty around food.

 

Guess what happened? Yeah I put all the weight back on and some!!

 

I realise now that I have to work on the inside stuff for the outside to follow.

 

This is much harder and takes much longer than a ‘diet’. Don’t get me wrong I still get

drawn towards the quick fixes.

 
Lose 7lbs in 7 days? oh yes please, where do i sign up. Doh!! NO NO NO (that’s me shouting at myself)!

 

Last year I kinda fell off the healthy wagon. I didn’t really exercise and I certainly didn’t eat very well.

 

I have spent this year getting back on track. I’m taking it steady eddy. I’m following a non-gimmicky nutrition plan.

 

I have lost roughly 7lbs in six months. I’m not sure because I have stopped weighing myself.

I just want to feel good by loving by body and mind.

 

I have invested my time in getting my body moving well again so I’m not in pain.

 

Here’s me with my Back to Life Babes having completed a 5k fun run. This was an achievement considering how unfit I had become.

This definitely made me feel more confident. I felt flippin’ AWESOME.

 

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being fit and healthy AND a busy mum is hard right??

Are you a busy mum like me who runs around after your family and doesn’t make time for yourself. I bet you’re nodding?? No? Well them you are doing something right – well done!!

Life is one big roller coaster, ups, downs, twists and turns. Let’s not forget the corkscrew where you seem to be going round and round, being thrown up side down!!

I felt like I was on the corkscrew for nearly two weeks earlier on this month. I was in a dark place, the black dog was on me. I felt tearful, overwhelmed, apathetic, angry, short tempered to name a few of the emotions. I felt lost and as though there was no way out. I didn’t think it would ever end!

It felt like PMS but on steroids ! I don’t usually have PMS as such as I have had an early menopause at 38 (3 years ago) and don’t have periods. However I have been on the oral contraceptive pill for 6 months as a way of giving my body some hormones. It worked well for a time but judging by the way I felt earlier this month it’s not working now!

Any hoo…. now I’ve had a period (a ‘pretend’ one because of the pill) I feel a lot calmer.

This means that I can reflect on what made me feel so bad so quickly. It wasn’t any one thing, it was a culmination of things. The signs were all there but I chose to ignore them.

  • Taking on too much
  • not doing anything for me. Self care
  • Not spending enough time with family and friends
  • Working too much
  • Not saying no
  • Not ringing people and sharing how I feel
  • Not exercising
  • Not eating well

I have learnt the painful way that I have to look after ME to look after everyone else. Before I thought that sounded selfish but now I have turned that around.

I like this analogy.

Imagine you were on a plane and the pilot announced that you were going to have to make an emergency landing. The oxygen masks come done. Who’s mask do you put on first, your childs or yours?

Your’s of course!! If you don’t have oxygen you won’t be able to save your child.

Busy mums we have to start to look after ourselves! Yes it’s hard but it’s worth it. No one wants to be stressed out, ratty, snappy to their loved ones!

What can you do to look after yourself? It doesn’t have to be a huge gesture. Start with small things. A small daily act is better than a big event every 6 months.

  • take up a hobby
  • take a bath
  • learn something new
  • go for a walk
  • relax with a book
  • nap/rest
  • learn to meditate (this is one that i really want to do but I can’t yet get it in my life yet)
  • pamper yourself
  • you get the idea…..
I’m happy to say that I am feeling MUCH better now 🙂 I am making sure that EVERY DAY I am doing something for ME no matter how small and it’s working.
I accept that I will have up and down days and that’s ok too. I now have a back up plan if I start to feel that way again. I need to STOP and listen to what my body/mind needs. Easier said than done and it will take practice. For me it’s about progress not perfection

Life is too short not to be kind and look after yourself. Someone said to me just ‘keep it simple’ and ‘this too shall pass’ that is really helping me today.

Stop, slow down, enjoy life and be grateful for all that you have.

Have a great day

Tanith x